Unloved and Forgotten

This is me resting…alone. …By myself. ..On a cold wooden floor. …unloved….forgotten.

Where are my humans? ……One is relaxing and the other is taking this picture of me…..mocking me….saying I am Sooooo big now. Bigger than the dishwasher. How would you lie to be told, “you’re bigger than a dishwasher”?   More importantly, why are they not rubbing my belly? Why are they not rubbing my ears? Why are they not totally and 100% focused on my happiness?  SIgh, big sigh! I want someone who will be more devoted to my whims and desires. Oh the indignities of not having a pillow for my head!

 AND THEN, Tonight my dad forgot to feed ME! he remembered at almost 10:00! Someone should call the animal rights activists!  I mean really 10:00, seriously? Are you kidding me? 10:00. ……and do you know what his excuse was? He said HE was tired! I mean cumon’ what the heck does HE do all day?  What a Diva!   …and he thinks he makes up for it with an apology, some sausage in my dog food, and three large milkbones? …

I am thinking  he needs more training.

….maybe I’ll eat his shoes and make him go barefoot, see how he likes that!
Life Lesson: Sometimes you need to let those who help you take a break.

I Think I have Graduated?

 I used to be a spoiled little dog. I use to cry when I was left alone. I used to be a slightly picky eater, I used to want a lot of attention.

Now I have graduated. Now I am, a spoiled big dog. Now I don’t cry when I get left alone, I BARK!  Now I am a professionally picky eater. I only eat the best “human Grade” food. Now I DEMAND a lot of attention.

I am now a “Prima Donna”, (I guess before I was just a donna?). I used to be a “nudge”, now I am a DIVA! I used to be a little pain in the a**. Now I am a big PITA, (Pain In The A**!!!)

My dad says this can all be cured with a little metal object, they call a bullet, …but I think he is just joking….I think?

Life Lesson: Humans are easilly trained.

Its All About ME!

Hi, My name is Meatball. I am a DOG, but I am not just a dog. I am so much more. I am a stubborn, spoiled, diva, dog. Ok, there I said it. Yes, I have needs and my humans are in charge of satisfying them. Hmmm, I am kinda’, like a democrat. Yeah, I am entitled! Where is my Xbox? Where is my I-phone? Where is my tax return?  I am not worried about Mitt Romney,  I have a saftey net…………..mom and dad!

(the preceding opinions are not neccisarily the opinions of this station and are intended for the sole use barking dog talk)

I am a spoiled diva. I get to sit around the house all day, people come in to feed me, ( my humans are trained), and they also walk me and take me places. I must say though  that I do have a job, ( I am not very good at it yet, ’cause I am still a puppy, so I am in training…cut me some slack, eh)….oooh, did ya’ get that “eh” at the end? that was me speaking Canadian!    Anyway where was I, Oh yeah, my job is to protect the house. I bark at all the strangers that come close to our domain.

Today I was especially well rewarded. When my dad came home I got to go out. while we were out walking I met a very nice lady ina car who stopped and talked to me, rubbed my head too. Then I met a couple of neighbors. I got to play with Russ from across the street. THEN, my dad took me for a long walk, we walked all the way to the ball field where he took me off the leash and we ran and ran and ran! Woohooooooo! Thats not all! for dinner I got some leftover steak with the steak juice, ( ok, blood) and some rice and a little bit of veggies in my food.  After that I got o nap and play, play and nap. Like WOW, isn’t life great sometimes?

Like I said, “my humans are trained…well trained.”

Life Lesson: There is no place like home.

Too Embarassing for photos!

Ok, this is going to be short. I don’t want photos because sooner or later they will come back to haunt me. I don’t want to be in the unfortunate position of say some politician or movie star, where something I did, or was to have been porportive to have done,when I was younger comes back to haunt me as a major scandal, when I run for office or become famous.

I mean really, poor Herman Caine. there is no proof, only accusations from some…. well, lets say dubious charecters with new found and unknown financial backing, whose personal motives are still unclear. Or say, Kim Kardashian. A sweet uncommonly attractive woman, who may have made a youthful indiscretion and was out there for others to take advantage of.

No, not me. I am saying this now as damage control for when I become a celebrity. I am coming clean. Lets end the rumors and contriversy before it starts!
 YES, my mom did spoon feed me some of my dinner last week.     OK, Ok, I was acting a bit the spoiled diva, maybe a bit “bratty movie star ish”.       and I did enjoy it!

BUT, I don’t want to let the tabloids run amok and start all sorts of rumors that I am always a spoon fed baby……………. I just sometimes can be particular and it does feel nice for someone to spoil you occasionally.

S there, its out there now, ..end of story!

Life Lesson: Admit your flaws and indiscretions right away, it is the best form of damage control, i.e. take your lumps and move on.

Ok, One picture just for the camera………