WHAT! Shrubbery indoors?

Apparently Someone has decided it is now ok to put shrubbery indoors! OR, maybe my dad has decided to become a shrubber? I caught him the other day bringing a tree inside.  He has never brought even a branch indoors for me to chew on, he always makes me leave them outside. Now all of a sudden an entire freakin’ tree!   ….smells nice though.

  Maybe it’s there so I don’t have to go outside to pee? I mean it is getting colder out. Hmmmm, what a good idea! When it gets cold outside the humans bring the bathroom inside. BRILLIANT! No more going out in the cold in the morning.  ……Ok, where do I poop?

  Well, that was my first thought, then he started hanging lights on it, (duh, I can see it without lights)…Oh, maybe that is so I can find it at night so I can pee 24/7? ….Then he started decorating it? Now this is getting weird…a fancy pee place?
I go from the rustic outdoors to a , a neon, 42nd street, cheap brothel pee tree. What next? Am I to go from crapping on the grass to some sort of golden platter with a diamond, ( zirconia, no doubt) encrusted target? Or some ceramic throne to have to sit on?

   ………………………late update, I still have to pee and poop outside in the cold and have been told to stay away from the shrubbery. ……sigh.

Life Lesson: We on the “inside”, ( whether it be dogs, people or even shrubbery) are in a different club than those on the “outside”, but just as there are rules of the jungle, there are also rules of the indoors.


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