Ok, call me paranoid, but am I really? It all started out so innocently. I turned 6 months old and dad takes me to the vet, this guy could possibly be a mad scientist, hey I don’t know, I’m just sayin’. He also has the pretty, innocent looking assistant, and really good cookies, ( standard B movie casting if you ask me).They are very sweet there….hmmmmm, maybe too sweet. They grope me all over obstensibly to check my joints, they look at my ears, they look at my eyes, they make me sit on this big metal “floor table” and watch the dial above, it reads 100, so I get a cookie. Hmmmm again, was that because it said 100 or was it because I sat still, of were they just trying to win me over for what was to come?
So this “mad scientist”, the “sweet assistant” and my dad, Hmmm, is he even really who he says he is, he doesn’t look like me, ( but then again he feeds me real good stuff, walks me, plays with me, and is like always there and that is good enough for me, so he gets a pass!). Anyway this cast of charecters confer for a few minutes. Meanwhile in the background I here a cat cryin’ and dogs barking. It makes me wonder what kind of wierd scientific experiments are being done in this place????
Then, the very sweet lady, who by the way I think I am bigger than she is, and I could probably “take” her if it came down to ….oh, never mind, I am sweet too. Anyway she gets me in a headlock while my dad was distracting me with one of those delightful cookies. THEN ZING! The Mad Scientist in the white coat jabs me in the back with a needle, boy that cookie was GOOD!
I am hearing all sorts of things about “implant”, “chipped”, “micro…yum, those are good cookies…..I couldn’t really concentrate on the conversation. Hey, I’m a dog, cut me some slack, I have big floppy ears, it’s hard to hear, and I’m only 6 months and I don’t understand. To me “micro-chipped” is just some very small potato chip almost not worth getting up for…I said almost.
Life Lesson: Big Brother IS probably watching, but his assistant has you in a headlock, so enjoy the cookies.